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For the last two years, conversations about AI in education have tended to fall into two camps: excitement about efficiency or fear of replacement. Teachers worry they’ll lose authenticity. Leaders worry about academic integrity. And across the country, schools are trying to make sense of a technology that feels both promising and overwhelming.
But there’s a quieter, more human-centered opportunity emerging–one that rarely makes the headlines: AI can actually strengthen empathy and improve the quality of our interactions with students and staff.
Not by automating relationships, but by helping us become more reflective, intentional, and attuned to the people we serve.
As a middle school assistant principal and a higher education instructor, I’ve found that AI is most valuable not as a productivity tool, but as a perspective-taking tool. When used thoughtfully, it supports the emotional labor of teaching and leadership–the part of our work that cannot be automated.
From efficiency to empathy
Schools do not thrive because we write faster emails or generate quicker lesson plans. They thrive because students feel known. Teachers feel supported. Families feel included.
AI can assist with the operational tasks, but the real potential lies in the way it can help us:
- Reflect on tone before hitting “send” on a difficult email
- Understand how a message may land for someone under stress
- Role-play sensitive conversations with students or staff
- Anticipate barriers that multilingual families might face
- Rehearse a restorative response rather than reacting in the moment
These are human actions–ones that require situational awareness and empathy. AI can’t perform them for us, but it can help us practice and prepare for them.
A middle school use case: Preparing for the hard conversations
Middle school is an emotional ecosystem. Students are forming identity, navigating social pressures, and learning how to advocate for themselves. Staff are juggling instructional demands while building trust with young adolescents whose needs shift by the week.
Some days, the work feels like equal parts counselor, coach, and crisis navigator.
One of the ways I’ve leveraged AI is by simulating difficult conversations before they happen. For example:
- A student is anxious about returning to class after an incident
- A teacher feels unsupported and frustrated
- A family is confused about a schedule change or intervention plan
By giving the AI a brief description and asking it to take on the perspective of the other person, I can rehearse responses that center calm, clarity, and compassion.
This has made me more intentional in real interactions–I’m less reactive, more prepared, and more attuned to the emotions beneath the surface.
Empathy improves when we get to “practice” it.
Supporting newcomers and multilingual learners
Schools like mine welcome dozens of newcomers each year, many with interrupted formal education. They bring extraordinary resilience–and significant emotional and linguistic needs.
AI tools can support staff in ways that deepen connection, not diminish it:
- Drafting bilingual communication with a softer, more culturally responsive tone
- Helping teachers anticipate trauma triggers based on student histories
- Rewriting classroom expectations in family-friendly language
- Generating gentle scripts for welcoming a student experiencing culture shock
The technology is not a substitute for bilingual staff or cultural competence. But it can serve as a bridge–helping educators reach families and students with more warmth, clarity, and accuracy.
When language becomes more accessible, relationships strengthen.
AI as a mirror for leadership
One unexpected benefit of AI is that it acts as a mirror. When I ask it to review the clarity of a communication, or identify potential ambiguities, it often highlights blind spots:
- “This sentence may sound punitive.”
- “This may be interpreted as dismissing the student’s perspective.”
- “Consider acknowledging the parent’s concern earlier in the message.”
These are the kinds of insights reflective leaders try to surface–but in the rush of a school day, they are easy to miss.
AI doesn’t remove responsibility; it enhances accountability. It helps us lead with more emotional intelligence, not less.
What this looks like in teacher practice
For teachers, AI can support empathy in similarly grounded ways:
1. Building more inclusive lessons
Teachers can ask AI to scan a lesson for hidden barriers–assumptions about background knowledge, vocabulary loads, or unclear steps that could frustrate students.
2. Rewriting directions for struggling learners
A slight shift in wording can make all the difference for a student with anxiety or processing challenges.
3. Anticipating misconceptions before they happen
AI can run through multiple “student responses” so teachers can see where confusion might arise.
4. Practicing restorative language
Teachers can try out scripts for responding to behavioral issues in ways that preserve dignity and connection.
These aren’t shortcuts. They’re tools that elevate the craft.
Human connection is the point
The heart of education is human. AI doesn’t change that–in fact, it makes it more obvious.
When we reduce the cognitive load of planning, we free up space for attunement.
When we rehearse hard conversations, we show up with more steadiness.
When we write in more inclusive language, more families feel seen.
When we reflect on our tone, we build trust.
The goal isn’t to create AI-enhanced classrooms. It’s to create relationship-centered classrooms where AI quietly supports the skills that matter most: empathy, clarity, and connection.
Schools don’t need more automation.
They need more humanity–and AI, used wisely, can help us get there.
Timothy Montalvo, Iona University & the College of Westchester
Timothy Montalvo is a middle school educator and leader passionate about leveraging technology to enhance student learning. He serves as Assistant Principal at Fox Lane Middle School in Westchester, NY, and teaches education courses as an adjunct professor at Iona University and the College of Westchester. Montalvo focuses on preparing students to be informed, active citizens in a digital world and shares insights on Twitter/X @MrMontalvoEDU or on BlueSky @montalvoedu.bsky.social.
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