The Epidemic of Perfection
The Rise of "You’re Perfect" and "It’s All Good"
Recently, I’ve been told that I’m perfect, something I’m perfectly aware I’ve never been nor ever will be. This generous assessment has come from strangers when I apologize for bumping into them and from the exceedingly cheerful salespeople at the store where my daughter shops for clothes. "No, you’re perfect!" they’ll insist when I explain the need to rest my Gen X weariness on the fitting room floor where a modest "No problem" would have sufficed.
The Urge Toward Pronounced Perfection
The urge toward pronounced perfection is annoyingly catchy. Almost against my will, I now respond to emails with a knee-jerk "Perfect!" where I once would have said something more in line with the nevermind sensibility of my generation. "Sounds good," for example, or "OK."
The Role of Artificial Intelligence
Even our artificial intelligence exhorts us to greater heights of enthusiasm. To an email in which an acquaintance notes pleasantly, "It was nice seeing you last night," Gmail suggests a more boisterous reply: "It was great to see you too!" or "So fun!" Our chatbots likewise communicate with endless effervescence, just as we have taught them to do(!).
The Pressure to Be Good
When not being perfect, we are decidedly good. Should I so much as display a downbeat facial expression when fumbling a social nicety, the response is nothing short of impassioned: "No, you’re good!" Being good is for everyone. We are all good now that "You’re all good" has replaced both the Commonwealth "No worries" and the American standard "That’s OK."
The Critique of "It’s All Good"
But is it all good, really? It’s hard not to read something slightly defensive into this relentlessly bright veneer. Even when the zeal seems genuine, if misguidedly so, the new affirmative language has an almost oppressive bent. Most of us are willing to believe we are OK or that we are at least not a problem. It was easy to be no big deal. But who among us can live up to being all good, let alone perfect, all the time?
The Rise of "It’s All Good" in Popular Culture
The rise of "It’s all good" is commonly thought to have originated, like much American vernacular, in Black culture. According to a New Yorker article dedicated to the popularity of the phrase, M.C. Hammer’s 1994 hit "It’s All Good" was instrumental. Now everyone seems to use "It’s all good," sometimes as a way to shut down conversation around something that may actually be pretty bad.
The Impact on Everyday Interactions
Everyday chitchat once defaulted to a certain bland "I’m OK, you’re OK" neutrality. People were always "fine," even if we weren’t remotely fine and in no mood to discuss it. As far as everyone else was concerned, we would insist it was "no problem."
The Perils of "Toxic Positivity"
But this does create a vague aura of dishonesty around our daily interactions, and may even perpetuate it. One teacher friend pointed out what he called the "toxic positivity" of A.I.-generated college recommendation letters (yes, they’re becoming common), which tend to blurt out the same saccharine phrases of endorsement. Just as all kids cannot be geniuses, all assessments and the emotions that convey them cannot be this oppressively upbeat.
Conclusion
It’s hard not to see mindless optimism as an effort to balance the forceful nastiness and negativity of social media. It’s as if our emotional expressions have become as polarized as our politics, with the extremes loudly articulated at the expense of the old middling opinions and equivocal feelings.
FAQs
- Q: What is the origin of "It’s all good"?
A: The rise of "It’s all good" is commonly thought to have originated in Black culture. - Q: What is the impact of "It’s all good" on everyday interactions?
A: It creates a vague aura of dishonesty around our daily interactions, and may even perpetuate it. - Q: What is "toxic positivity"?
A: "Toxic positivity" refers to the excessive and insincere use of positive language, often used to mask negative emotions or to avoid difficult conversations.
